I'm holding me up

Ok so yesterday the summit ended and he texted me his goodbye. I wanted to c him b4 he left, I wanted him to hug me. But he didn't and I know that was 4 the best. I really do. Friday night we talked face to face and I told him how I felt and he told me how he felt. That was good b/c I had to get what I was feeling out. One comment he made really got to me though

He said, "I restored his faith in Women."

Well who cares I aint the woman u choose. I think I was suppose to take that comment as a compliment but I really didn't care.

U know how u have that picture of the perfect man 4 u, well he was it.
So getting to the whole point y I wrote this post is b/c I text my bestfriend and told her how I was feeling and she texts me back the real deal.

Now I don't know abt any1 else but I have friends that tell me the truth no matter what. Those are the kind of friends I have to have.

Well she broke it down 4 me. She basically said that I can't move forward without shutting the door on my past. So True matter of fact her and I have had this conversation many of times and what she was talking abt was the fact that I haven't filed for my divorce yet. I have been separated from my former husband for 7 years. I know I know ur probably wondering Y? So am I lol, but really I just haven't.

Let me clear up ur thoughts. No we r not still n love w/each other. In fact we don't even like each other (that's a whole other post). Just neither of us have filed. WOW. Writing this makes me feel dumb.

Now I believe everything n the bible so I know what the Word says about this and I know what the Holy Spirit has told me on several occasions abt getting my divorce. So like my friend said I'm the only one holding up my blessing. I believe God does everything n decency and order. There I've said it.

I'm holding me up!!!

Ok no more of me blogging abt what I've missed out on b/c I have been the cause of me missing a blessing.

This journey aint easy y'all and it took I guy that I desired to be w/to get married to some1 else for me to fully understand what God's been tryin to tell me all along. I hear U loud and clear Lord.

Sooooo another lesson learned n this class called Life...I hope I don't 4get it!
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